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Sunday, June 12, 2016

Why Me?

Do you wonder why you are here? Maybe you wonder what significance your life has. As one who has always been insecure, it took me years to see my life as important. In the world, a life is deemed important by how much money you make, or what kind of car you drive, or if your clothes cost a lot. The world sees success as having wealth, prestige, and important friends. 

I grew up with money, name brand clothes, and nice houses, and new cars. I was always on the fringe of having the right friends. In a large group, I was part of the popular, the elite of the class, but on a personal level, I was not included. I wasn't witty enough, bold enough, or pretty enough. I was just me.

There were many things I loved, and wanted to pursue, but, again, I wasn't smart enough, and was very shy, so those dreams were way above me. Been there? If not, you were lucky. I was just ordinary.No one hung on my words, no one followed what I did, and no one elected me for Prom Queen. I had friends, and I did a lot of activities, but my friends were not in the popular group.

In God's realm that all changes. Before I found His world, I decided to change the one I was in. I discovered if I drank, and smoked, I fit in better. I changed my hair, wore more makeup, and found clothes that were not modest. I became outgoing, and found new friends. It was fun, but I had no purpose other than fun, and self.

After many years of wandering, and wondering what my life meant, God found me! Once I committed my life to Him, I was a new person. Total opposite from what the world said I should be. Funny thing, though, I still looked at others, who were smarter, better, and had a purpose.  I still didn't know what I was supposed to be doing for God's Kingdom. What could I offer anyone? I was a flawed, sinner, who God saved by Grace, but I didn't know what to do with it.

Slowly I realized that my story, and my talents were as important as anyone else's. Over the years, God taught me that I am special, and my ministry was to love, obey, and serve Jesus. The talents God blessed me with are unique to me, and for some people, only those talents will help them. Some ministry was for a season, then God gave me a different season. 

The biggest lesson He taught me, was that every part of my life, from insecure, to now, is usable by God. Every crisis, every pain, every melt down can be used to minister to someone else. Whether I have suffered great illnesses, my chronic pain, relationship hurts, or feeling insignificant, it all matters to God.. He can and will use it all for the good of the Kingdom. Using every piece of my past, the good, the bad, and the ugly, God has blessed me with ministry wherever I go. I am significant,and
I have a purpose! If you aren't sure who you are, and why you are where you are, give it to God, He will make something beautiful out of the ashes. He did for me, and He will for you, if you are His!