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Monday, June 6, 2016

Fatherly Love

Can I be honest with you? Last week was a personal melt down for me. I don't usually fall apart, but when I let myself get tired and rundown, I let my own words invade my mind. I was depressed, and I never get depressed. I knew I was in trouble. I was trying to do too many things, plus take care of my husband who had surgery a month ago.

I am not telling you all this for sympathy, or to say, "poor me" but rather to show you how my Heavenly Father takes care of me! No one knows me better than He does. He knows exactly what I need in any situation, and when I need it.  Years ago God gave me a husband that usually knows what I need before I do. Much of God's wisdom goes through John. I'm still learning to listen to John.

I don't sleep well a lot of nights, and I found myself in a maze going nowhere. I was trying to be nurse, take care of the house, shopping, planting flowers, laundry, ironing. And in addition counseling at Church, mentoring, and taking a Biblical Counseling course. I found I was barely skimming the surface, not doing any chore well, and having no quiet time for Bible study, writing, or time with God! 

Last week it all crashed in on me. I called out to God, my Father and told Him I did 't know what to do. I was overwhelmed, and couldn't put two complete thoughts together, because I couldn't think! I seriously thought I was losing what gray matter I had left. I could relate to a gerbil in the little plastic ball they roll on the floor. Yes, I was a
Mess! I cried out Thursday, Friday, and Saturday. On Sunday, God answered!

Our Pastor's sermon, was titled Second Wind. The first thing he said was, we need to recharge our batteries, rest, and don't give up. Life is a marathon, so we need to be fully engaged. I learned I needed to make time to be alone, quiet, and listen to the still small voice of my Father. He will show me what I need in quiet whispers. He loves me even when I don't deserve it. I need to slow down, and let God show me His provision, and His character! 

I need to do what I can, and not stress if it doesn't all get done in my time frame. When I am counseling it is so easy for me to tell others this wisdom, but hard to follow when it is me. Mostly, I need to remember it isn't all on my back, and it's not all about me.  I need to take time to breathe Him in. In life there are many things that push us to he wall, and sooner or later, we all hit the wall!

I was blessed beyond belief as I sat there with tears in my eyes. I had cried out in desperation to God. I shouted out my frustration. I told God I just needed to rest! He already knew He had His words for me through our Pastor. Don't ever tell me God doesn't answer......He has proven it to me over and over. Sometimes I had to wait and wait for the answer, sometimes He gave me something better than I asked for, and sometimes He answers almost before the words are out of my mouth! 

I love when my Father shows me what I need to know. He teaches with patience, love, and all the provision of a loving father. An encounter with Him can and will always give me the second wind I need!  When He takes care of me, then I can come alongside others for the Kingdom. My life counts for my Father, and yours does too!