You see my place is the ceiling of our sanctuary at Church. Sounds weird I know, but it all started years ago when we were new to Westside Church in Omaha. At the time, I was not good at a budget, and the only major problems we had was my spending more than we had. By Sunday, I was usually dreading Monday, because I was juggling money, and not well. This didn't happen all the time, but it was often enough. I was afraid to let my husband help me, because I believed he would no longer love me, if he knew I had messed up.
My life long battle with self esteem and fears of being a loser, colored everything I did. It took God a long time to move me through all this. I began feeling safe when we sang praise music, and I started looking up to the heavens. Actually that was the ceiling of our sanctuary. I can't explain it, I just know it started becoming a place that soothed my soul, made me feel safe, and that never went away! When I looked up at that high ceiling, I felt closer to God. I could picture Him above me in Heaven, looking down.
That may seem strange, but I don't know how else to say it. This was our first time at Westside. John was then pastor of a Church in Schuyler, and then a pastor on staff at Cornerstone Church in Omaha. Even though we were gone from Westside for awhile, it was always our Church home. Now we have been back for three years, and my safe haven, my ceiling still means the same to me.
Most of our problems now are health concerns, but God has brought us through so much. I can not imagine singing praise music on Sunday without my ceiling. It has been painted different colors over the years, but it is still my go to place to pray during a song, be uplifted by the songs words, and to praise my Lord for all He does! It reminds me of God's care, His unlimited love, and that I am safe!
I can't explain my peace, and joy when I lift my eyes to that ceiling, but it is real for me!
No comments:
Post a Comment