Does It Show?

There are people in my life that just amaze me. If you look at their lives, really look, what do you see? I see people who never let others see their pain. They continue in their jobs, take care of families, and minister to others dailey.  I see one who has been battling cancer for years. Even the ravages of chemo do not show on their face. 

Other friends walk each day with the burden of chronic pain. Whether it is arthritis. fibromyalgia, cancer, or MS, they make it through each day with a smile on their face. How do these brave people do that? I have seen others in my life that complain, and moan and groan each step of their life's journey. They want to make sure everyone knows how miserable they are. 

One group carries on, one group wants sympathy from all around them.

One group lives in spite of their problems, while the others want to carry their ills around as an excuse for everything they don't want to do. One group is concerned for others, while the other group is all for themselves.

I know this may seem harsh on my part, but I have been close to people in both groups. I have been a part of both groups. There was a time when I blamed everyone, and everything for my ills. I was mean, nasty, and felt it was my due to be pampered and coddled if I was hurting. Believe me it is not fun to be that person, or associated with that person.

The thing that stands out for me is that no matter how miserable some of these people are, they don't burden others with it. They have accepted that this is a part of their lives, and they simply do not let it determine how they will live that life.  I have learned that my chronic pain does not define me.

It is not always easy to put that pain aside, whether it is physical or mental, it can surround you in a fog of dispair until you can't think of anything else. It is easier to lash out, to hide, to play the "poor me" card. Like I said, I have been in both places. I admire those who keep on keeping on, no matter what. The other group is too hard to help, because no matter what you say or do, it is never right.

I so admire those who keep going, who reach out to others, and who do their crying in private! What makes that night and day difference? It is Jesus in a life! The pain is still there, the illness may never be cured, but the person has a relationship with Jesus, and He gets them through. Before Jesus in my life, I was the poor me. Now that Jesus rules my life, I give it to Him. Some days are very hard, and prayers are constant to make it through the day. Some days are not as bad. The prayers are still there, but also much praise.

I have found that if I focus on Jesus and on others, my pain is less! If you focus only on yourself and whatever pain you are dealing with, it makes it worse. I rely on Christ to help me through each day. Sometimes it is hanging on second by second, but He is always there. He encourages me to pray for others and to keep a smile on my face. It is very uncomfortable for family and friends to hear never ending complaints about your pain. Why? It's not that they don't love you, but that they don't know what to do to help you.

I sometimes don't think I am very brave or even have a handle on this pain thing, but when I look back on the extreme moments, I then see just what God brought me through, and I did get through.

I pray you don't have pain issues, or cancer, or extreme surgeries to get through, but if you do, I pray that you know Jesus personally, and have made Him Lord of your life. Only then can you come through with a smile on your face, thinking of other people, and going on with your life, no matter what else is in your life!

Carolyn McBreen Gibbs Blog: Joy Comes In The Morning

Carolyn McBreen Gibbs Blog: Joy Comes In The Morning: You can learn a lot in a lifetime. I have learned that I will rise up, no matter what the pain or problems I encounter. I have learned above...

Joy Comes In The Morning

You can learn a lot in a lifetime. I have learned that I will rise up, no matter what the pain or problems I encounter. I have learned above all that without Christ leading me, living in me, I can not survive. I have a tendency to see my issues as failures. I grew up believing there was no mercy. There was only my inadequacy to blame for whatever happened. 

I always felt I was an embarrassment. I didn't belong, and even what I thought was my best was a let down for others. I was weak, flawed,  and no matter what, I couldn't see beyond my flaws. Sometimes all we are able to see is the rubble of our lives.

Because of my view, I saw myself as a detriment to ministry. I finally let God teach me, and show me that He could and would use me for His Kingdom. My flaws were what Christ saw and used to reach others who may feel the same way. My brokenness was the bridge others needed. What Jesus taught me over the years, I could use to minister to the hurting.

Christ graciously equipped me with compassion, and empathy. Now the problem with empathy is that whatever hurts others hurts me. It is hard to carry the pain of others', but that is what God has equipped me for. Sometimes, I want so much to help and make it better, I try to run ahead, and lose track of the fact that it is not me, it is Christ in me. It doesn't depend on me.

I want so badly to make everything O.K. That I falsely think it is up to me. Another thing learned, but sometimes forgotten. God is in control! I am nothing on my own, but it is Jesus in me that can help another. When I fall on my face, I need to let Him help me up! I can be there for others who have horrible problems, who are in impossible situations, but it is Jesus who can make a difference. If I give Him my broken pieces...ALL the pieces, He will make a way. He will mold me into what He wants me to be.

In some ways 2015 was a rough year, but God was always ahead of us. He already knew what was needed and He supplied in His own time, in His own way. How will I live this new year ahead? How will you? I will continue to learn at the Master's feet! The more I know Him, the more I love Him! I have learned that everything is in His mighty power to make right. I have learned that no matter what things look like, I can trust God to take care of it. I don't need to fix things. That is His job.

I can't convince others that Christ is the only way, but Christ can. I can't change the course of our country, but Christ can. I can't solve everyone's problems. I can't change the course some people take, but Christ can. Maybe you are feeling hopeless, defeated, sad, powerless, but as Jesus said to the man waiting for rescue n John 5:6, "Do you want to be well?"

As for me I will rise up and live what I believe. I will believe that with Jesus, there is hope for any situation, no matter how it looks.  I lived too long as a victim of my past.This year I will live my glorious future, whatever that looks like as one saved by God's grace. 

Carolyn McBreen Gibbs Blog: A Very Molly Year!

Carolyn McBreen Gibbs Blog: A Very Molly Year!: Yes, it's me, Molly! I had a super dedupper, year! Well some of it was a little scary, and weird, but it turned out O.K. I remember last...

A Very Molly Year!

Yes, it's me, Molly! I had a super dedupper, year! Well some of it was a little scary, and weird, but it turned out O.K. I remember last New Year because it was cold. I don't remember this much snow. Spring did come, and my Mom loves Spring! Except this Spring, she went to the doctor, and ended up in the hospital. I do not understand those things, but for four days it was just me and Dad. 

He bought me yummy chicken to eat, and he snuggled me when he was home. I missed Mom. Then one day, Dad called her at that place she was, and let me listen to her. He laughed, because, I couldn't figure out where she was. I could hear her, but couldn't find her. I ran around the room, but she wasn't there. I was so glad when she came home. 

Then before I Knew

it, Dad left for a long time. He had surgery, and was gone for several months! Mom came home late every night, and I was on guard to take care of her. I did get to go in the car and go see Dad when he was getting better. That was super fun. They had ice cream there, and I got my own cone!

Summer was lots of walks, and seeing ducks in our pool, and turkeys in our yard. Mom never did let me chase them. We sat outside on the porch, and on the deck. In July they have a holiday that they call 4th of July! It is lots of loud noises, and I don't like it very much! Mom had to give me pills, so I would sleep and not be so scared.

Before I knew it, the leaves started falling. When the wind blows, they chase me. I don't like that either. I do like play times with my best friend next door. That's Max! Sometimes Zoey was out too. We three have fun playing in the yard. Before long, we started having a lot of this white stuff. Mom says it is snow. I don't mind it too much, but when it's falling out of the sky, it gets in my eyes, and gets me wet. Walking in it is hard, and freezes my feet. It makes going potty really hard.

Mom and Dad were gone every night while Church had it's Christmas Pageant. I was sad, cause I like Mom and Dad to be with me. Now Christmas is over, and Mom says this is a new year. What does that mean? I just know that I am a very lucky girl, and another year is gone. This July I will be four years old!

I hope all of you had a good year, like I did. I also hope you have a very good New Year! As long as I have Mom and Dad, Max, and yummy food, my wolf, and my toys, it will be another good year for me, Molly!

Carolyn McBreen Gibbs Blog: Addicted!

Carolyn McBreen Gibbs Blog: Addicted!: I can very easily become addicted to things. An addiction is defined as anything one needs on a regular basis, and can not live without. Som...

Addicted!

I can very easily become addicted to things. An addiction is defined as anything one needs on a regular basis, and can not live without. Some addictions are not as bad as others, but when I focus on what I want, it is rarely a good thing. There are the obvious addictions. My first was smoking. Once I started, it became a most enjoyable part of my life. Quitting didn't work, because I didn't want to quit.

Without this "friend," I was crabby, and not nearly as sociable.

Smoking was part of my identity. Next, was drinking. Granted, I didn't do it all the time, but It too was part of my life. I felt very with it, and in charge while drinking. You would think that once you went through being sick and hung over, that would end it. No. I enjoyed the status of having drinks with friends, or at dinner.

It is easy for me to become addicted to food too. When I find something that I love, it becomes part of the joy of eating. Snacks are special culprits. What happens in forming an addiction? It is forming the habit of something that becomes a part of your life. Even the thought of doing without Spurs you to hang on to it even harder!

I have at times, become addicted to T.V. For a time I had to watch movies everyday on the Lifetime Channel. I planned my day around it. I let Bible study slide, I didn't take time for prayer, I didn't do ministry, because I was too preoccupied with trivial pursuit. The more I did this day after day, the more miserable I became! Like any of my addictions, I had to finally turn it over to The Lord, and let Him be in charge! Once I got to the desperate point, I let go, and fought to get free!

In each case, I could not fight it alone. I am human, I am weak. Some addictions in life, are even harder to dislodge. People use all kinds of things to heal their wounded, fragile, souls! Whether it is food, drugs, alcohol, pornography, sex, or even T.V., we all at one time or another grasp something to make us feel better about ourselves. I know that I was insecure, and had a very low self-image. The way I learned to cope was to hold a drink, a cigarette, or dress to get attention. In that world I created, I could feel adequate. I could feel better and appear better than I was. 

I am not proud of how messed up I was. I am extremely grateful that Jesus saw me in all my ugliness, and false identity, and loved me enough not to leave me there! Once I met Jesus, and gave my life to Him, He changed my heart, and let me see that I didn't need the garbage to be accepted. Did it happen overnight? No, it has been a journey! God has patiently walked me through the past, and helped me deal with each part of my life. He has shown me who I am in Him! 

I must tell you I am not totally there yet! I can still very easily get addicted to things like sweets, and T.V.

But, it is short lived. God lovingly shows me what I am doing, and helps me to go a different direction. I am so thankful I can lean on Him. Nothing is too messed up, or too difficult for Him! It is choices! He will guide and direct you, but you still have a choice! Do you know what your addictions are? Maybe you don't have any. But if you do....Jesus can and will help....just ask Him! I am so glad I did!